With all that is going on the world, it's hard to stay positive. Thankfully, nature has been helping me cope.

Nature is great. And my walks/runs by the Charles River are great. But, it's not enough. I need my experiences again, especially the simple ones. I miss going to a cafe...sitting there for hours and simply doing work.

Therefore, I am going to keep this post short because I am respecting my own mental health. Here is a poem about hard times.

Photo from Unsplash by Finn

Being home all the time has filled me with such anxiety. So as always, I turn to the activities that make me happy.

Although, my approach was different this time.

I attended one of Rupi Kaur's writing workshops (on Instagram Live). Her process allowed me to be creative... particularly because we wrote without thinking.

Sometimes, writing without a filter gets me in the zone. And I'm happy to say that I have made some progress on the fictional books that I have been writing in my free time.

Here is the Spoken Word poem that I wrote during the writing workshop.

Photo from Unsplash by Janko Ferlič

This week, I enrolled in Yale’s free online course: “The Science of Well-Being.” During this uncertain time, I have had more opportunities to do things that make me happy. Learning is one of them.

I am such a nerd, I know.

In high school, we studied happiness and I was always fascinated by the topic. Therefore, learning about well-being through a college course at one of the best institutions in the country is eye-opening.

Corona. This virus is what everyone has been talking about… and its impact has been crazy. Although, I most likely will not die from this virus, others might.

And the healthcare system is feeling overwhelmed because of this crisis. Therefore, I am staying at home as much as I can.

I enjoy being alone. I am an introvert, but frequently pretend to be an extrovert. So it’s nice to focus on me for once. I have been getting ahead on assignments, reading, exercising, binge watching, and of course: writing.

I also feel lonely. But, it comes in waves, as does my anxiety.

If anything, this alone time has taught me that I am imperfect, but I am happy with the person I have become because I keep trying to be better.

Here is a poem about being alone. It may be sensitive to some people.

As you all know, winter is coming to an end. I finally had the opportunity to go skiing, even though the season is nearly over.

It’s been years since I last went skiing! Therefore, I was extremely happy to go. One thing that I was not so happy about was the cold. I wore many layers. Sometimes, they were enough and other times, they were not enough.

After all, I was exercising so sometimes those layers felt suffocating. But, then other times, I felt the cold wind and yeah… no explanation needed.

Anyways, here is a short fragment about cold nights and how they don’t have to be so cold.

One thing that I enjoy about being in Boston is the freedom that I have. I can do almost whatever I want, whenever I want. I say almost because there’s a little thing called graduate school that I’m in, which prevents me from taking very long vacations while in school!

So one day after my presentation, I decided to treat myself.

If you don’t know this, you should: Boston is known for its cannolis. I already visited Mike’s Pastry and Modern Pastry. But, I never got to try Bova’s Bakery, which is a lesser-known bakery in Boston’s North End.

There’s a few more places that I want to try for cannolis, such as Parziale’s Bakery. But I know that I’ll have a chance down the road.

Anyways, I am glad that I put a little excitement into my life and was spontaneous.

Even though this was just a trip to the North End. I went at nighttime and by myself. And of course, that can be dangerous. However, I was careful and did not live my life in fear. For me, doing things is much more important than living in fear.

Here’s a little poem about traveling and doing things for yourself.

Photo from Unsplash by Angelina Kichukova.

I am changing my topic last minute. I don’t know why. I don’t feel too great today and slept for a majority of the day. And this will require more thinking power.

But, I think this is an important topic: it’s okay not to feel okay. We forget to look after ourselves. Today, I felt guilty for not being able to make it to my on-campus job. We should not feel guilty for feeling unwell, but we do.

What is the point of going to work when you’ll just be unproductive? Listen to your body. It is demanding for a break.

After moving to Boston, I think it is safe to say my caffeine addiction has grown. I am especially addicted to matcha. One of the prettiest matcha drinks is in Seaport. It’s from Taiyaki NYC - Boston, the home of strange, but yummy ice cream.

Now, I know my obsession with caffeine is not a real addiction. But every time I buy it, I feel so guilty. Because guess what? There is a headache the next day.

I have become so dependent on caffeine to fuel my day. And I realize this is normal, but I do not like the feeling. I want to go back to having caffeine occasionally, as a treat.

Caffeine makes me feel like I can do anything and that is why I am so drawn to it.

Well technically, I was not on top of the world. I was dining at Top of the Hub. And wow, what a view!

We waited for a window seat and it was definitely worth the wait.

Earlier that day, I opened a fortune cookie that said: “Soon you will be sitting on top of the world.” What an accurate fortune. You bet, I am!

Seeing all of Boston down below left me in awe. We ordered a few things and one of them was oysters. I never had oysters before so that was an interesting experience!

Dining at Top of the Hub got me thinking: what must it feel like to be dining at these sorts of places regularly? What must it feel like to be rich and not worry about the bill?

I am not saying that I have anything against the rich, but I am grateful that I felt economic struggle. It humbles and changes you in a way that is indescribable.

I finally made it to Sonsie, which is a brunch place on Newbury Street. The meal itself was not too fancy. It was the atmosphere that really made the place special. Luckily, we were seated somewhat near the windows, which made the experience memorable.

During brunch, I mentioned that I consider myself to be a smart person. However, there are just certain things that I cannot understand.

Of course, I cannot really comprehend subjects that I have not studied in-depth. But sometimes, someone will say something really profound and I do not know how to answer them in an adequate way.

I have always been told to be the best version of myself. Therefore, how can I not be the best in the simple art of conversation? It’s supposed to be easy.

I guess it’s the introverted side of me that knows how much work conversations actually are...

Thankfully, I have learned that it is okay not to know what to say because a lot of people struggle with this idea of having it all.

Here is a poem about the downside of striving to be perfect.

As the title indicates, I am extremely thankful for chocolate. In fact, I am a firm believer that chocolate can fix just about anything.

I had the pleasure of experiencing L.A. Burdick Chocolates, Cambridge and it is a great place to satisfy my sweet tooth.

When I went to experience this well-known chocolate haven, it was raining… which is not ideal. However, I got to have hot chocolate on a rainy day, which is one of the best feelings ever.

Here is an ode to one of the best desserts.

Photo from Unsplash by Javardh

I am back in my element. Graduate school has started up again and I am happy to be learning. But, I also feel busy and it is hard to make time for everything.

I started writing a 20 for 2020 list and most of my goals are about creating balance in my life. I’m excited for the year ahead and hope that I will achieve most of my goals, no matter how small or big.

Photo from Unsplash by Jordan Whitfield

People often say that eyes are the windows to the soul and I agree. Simply looking into a person’s eyes can allow you to connect with that person on a deeper level.

By taking a look at someone's eyes, you also have a sense of how that individual is feeling at that particular moment. For example, people often have “sad eyes” when they are trying to fake a smile.

The New York Times mentioned a study in which two people stare into each other’s eyes for four minutes in order to fall in love. And this got me thinking.

Photo from Unsplash by Deniz Altindas

Before I begin this post, I want to say that I am not generalizing. Not all people are like this and I do not want anyone to feel upset. I am simply sharing my experiences.

As you may know, I have been practicing yoga more. And there’s a certain trend that I have been noticing at various yoga places.

Many instructors, white and non-white, provide extra help to people of color so they can adjust their yoga poses. However, a white person could be doing the “same mistake” and they seem to ignore it.

I do not think these people are aware of what they are doing, but it shows a bigger problem.

The example that I gave is on the smaller scale. It could easily be that I am reading too much into things. Regardless, the microaggression of needing to fix has become very commonplace in our society.

And I’m guilty of this too. I think everyone is. As a privileged person of color, I have found myself guilty of making less privileged people of color uncomfortable (unintentionally).

On January 1st of 2020, I visited a very familiar cafe: Maison Mathis in New Haven.

I ordered avocado toast. At first, I did not realize why I ordered something that I could make so easily at home. But, it dawned on me that I miss the memories that are associated with the cafe, not its food (even though the food is delicious).

Being in Connecticut reminded me that my undergraduate years are over. And that is okay. I cannot keep comparing graduate school to what I felt in undergraduate. Life does not work that way. Comparison is not healthy.

However, memories are important and should be treasured. For me, memories and expectations for the future come in fragments.

Photo from Unsplash by NordWood Themes

This is my last blog post of 2019.

Wow. What a year it has been. I am sure that I am not alone in this sentiment, but 2019 was a wacky year. It has been one of the best and worst years of my life. I traveled and had many incredible experiences. I also felt alone and fought countless battles.

I learned so much about myself and this year forced me to grow.

Photo from Unsplash by Steve Halama

I’m a romantic and that is a hard type of person to be in today’s world. People come and go. Apps rule our lives. And it seems like no one cares about trying anymore.

At the same time, a commitment of marriage scares me so much. Finding your person sounds amazing, but what if your person hurts you? People can hurt you so easily. I know that I should try to look on the bright side, but a lifelong partnership is quite daunting. It really puts pressure on an individual.

I have written many poems about love, but I'll treat you to one of them today.

Photo from Unsplash by Todd Kent

My first semester of graduate school is almost over. Living in the Boston area has been great. However, there are some moments where I miss the slower moments. And a caring atmosphere. As nice as it is to live in an exciting area, it's not always glamorous.

Photo from Unsplash by Jimmy Chang

This week, I have been thinking about impact. Yesterday, I attended a student art exhibit at Harvard University. The art exhibit was on Islamic art. The methods that students used to portray Islam in art were very creative and insightful.

I learned quite a lot, including that it is believed that Prophet Muhammad’s (PBUH) favorite color was green. Art can express such interesting information in an engaging manner.

I appreciated this exhibit because my relationship with my faith is a complex one. I’ll be the first to admit that I am not religious.

I question Islamic as well as Ismaili practices frequently. But for me, that is part of the learning process. And it allows me to work towards being religious.

To answer my questions, I enjoy reading texts and talking to people who have a better understanding of faith. I am eternally grateful for my religion because it encourages questions.

I like to believe we are all part of something bigger. Just like how a drop of water is part of something bigger. Here is my poem called “Droplet.”

Like many people, I love F.R.I.E.N.D.S.

Luckily for me and other fans of the show, Boston had a pop-up dedicated to this popular show. The pop-up featured facts about the show, props that were used, and there were plenty of photo opportunities!

The concept of friendship has always been interesting to me. It seems that friendships are harder to navigate than romantic relationships. Maybe because it is harder to tell a friend when they have upset you.

People always mention fights with significant others. There are many romantic relationship experts who give amazing advice about how couples can cope with struggles. But, it seems like there are fewer discussions regarding how one can better friendships.

Here is a short poem that I wrote about the uglier side of friendship.