Sometimes to understand the bigger picture, you need to push yourself and go beyond the surface level. This thought reflects that, enjoy :)

This week, I have been more on edge and strangely protective of myself, avoiding old hurt. To cool down, I have been making more time to explore Boston’s hidden nooks and crannies. It was a little bit of a physical and emotional struggle, especially in such hot weather.

But I am so glad that I wandered. I found an area dedicated to being hidden from society and felt so ashamed. Places like this are heartbreaking to see, but they have created some beauty to make it home (as sad as that is).

This is how the poor lives. Here is a thought I had while taking this photo.

It has been a strange week. Lately, I have been feeling so much joy in my life. I also feel so much sadness for what is happening in the world. I feel uncertain about what the future holds.

Simply put, my feelings are mixed. There is a choice, a pivot coming. My heart is uneasy. Here is “A Tale of Two Worlds.”

Hi!

Do you remember how I attempted a new style?

Well here it is & the audio can be heard here

This week had photos, special events, and some reflection. So naturally, I had some thoughts about the process of getting prepared for these things.

I love getting ready but also dislike it. I never feel the way “I am supposed to” on the inside & outside.

My overthinking and expectations seem to rob me of joy. As a society, we place way too much emphasis on the one emotion of joy. But there are other emotions. Nothing is permanent.

Anyways, here are some scrambled thoughts :)

Hello! What a week it has been (me every week). There's a LOT going on (good and bad). So here's a thought that yours truly (a happy, stressed mess) came up with.

Apparently languishing might be the dominant emotion of 2021, so that’s just great.

So to temporarily escape my “absence of well-being” like many of us, I reflected on Earth Day.

Here is a thought that ties the blah to what’s happening to Mother Nature.

Oh gosh, writing has gotten me through a lot. This week, I attempted a new style and was surprised by my passion. I don't think I'm ready to share yet, but here is a simple fragment from my mind while I wrote my heart out.

Being in New York City again felt good. It was my first time back since Jan 1, 2020. I was struck by the deja vu moments and full circle-ness of it all.

But mostly, I am thankful for getting the vaccine. I told myself that I would not post, but the circumstances were full of luck and awe. In short, I am thankful to have gotten J&J and given up my old Pfizer spot to someone else.

Here are the thoughts that circled my mind while getting that precious shot.

Yesterday, I stumbled on a prompt that told me to include a particular word in my writing.

It fit easily into this poem. Any guesses?

The impact from people can be felt years later in sometimes the smallest of ways. I find that to be quite beautiful. The poem is inspired by this notion. Enjoy :)

Image via Instagram.

Hate against Asians is not a new thing. However, there has been a recent rise in hate crimes against Asian Americans.

I am grateful for my walks. Before the pandemic, walks with no destination were a treat. Now, they have become routine.

This week, I tried a guided walking meditation from "This Difficult Thing of Being Human." I enjoyed the experience immensely.

Here is a thought from a walk.

So I’m really attempting to be positive. But we all know it is March, and it has been about a year since our lives have turned upside down.

I am not going to give too much context to this poem, but it’s a product of my late-night thoughts, as is this photo.

This week was a nice change of pace. I had the opportunity to be outdoors. But I was also stuck inside (on a nice day) writing a paper. The thing is: I was not as bitter about it.

I think that I am making the best out of most situations. My mindset is changing. The grief is still there. However, I am feeling more like the girl that laughed and meant it.

One thing that I have noticed is that I am studying the world around me more. Noticing the world can take on many shapes and forms, such as analyzing that paper or feeling the snow against my body. Overthinking can be a good or bad thing. But, I have seen the good in it this week.

Swans have weirdly influenced my life. I grew up watching the Swan Princess movies, which was a reminder to be elegant all the time.

There’s also a quote, something along the lines of: “learn to be a swan… graceful and calm above water, frantically paddling underneath.”

That’s not realistic so, I have decided to abandon my idea of holding it together all the time.

I am not in a pre-pandemic headspace, and that’s okay. It’s not like all is gone. I am only shifting my focus.

Besides school, my main priority is my health: physical and mental.

Fortunately, I have taken some measures and am feeling more like my normal self! Slowly, but surely, I will get there if I keep listening to my body.

This week, I have been spending some time with children on Zoom. The way their minds work is unbelievable. They see the magic in the mundane, and it is heartwarming.

I always joke that I’ll never try to be a mother. But certain moments make me think otherwise. Here is a thought that tries to put these feelings into words.

My time management skills have taken a hit. But, this week has taught me the importance of being there.

I know sometimes, I overdo it. I overextend. I throw everything into someone who may not even see it. And people have told me it is not your job to take on their problems. It is not your job to lose your time.

What is the point of thinking like that? This is me. Yes, I get frustrated. Yes, I get exhausted. But at the end of the day, people will always remember how you made them feel. And in my opinion, I have maintained plenty of connections; but have also burned many bridges.

I hope that I do not burn too many more. Here is "Be there."

School started up again, and it’s been hard to get back into a routine (which is good and bad).

In one of my classes, we talked about brand positioning in a corporate and personal sense.

While brainstorming, someone called me outgoing. While this isn’t the first time I have heard this, I don’t see myself that way. Today’s poem is about how my “brand” may not be who I am.

Amanda Gorman via The New York Times

Why aren’t inaugural poems more of a thing!?

Amanda Gorman was the inaugural poet for this year’s inauguration, and wow. She tied together so many thoughts and feelings into excellent prose. And that ending, icing on the cake.